Welcoming 2008 with Hope
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The new year brings fresh beginnings, unique opportunities, novel experiences, new friends, hopefully, and memorable days with old friends. It is the time of year when the biggest cynic can’t help but feel optimistic!
Last week I was visiting with a group of friends from high school and college. We get together every year during the holidays to share a meal, reminisce and catch up on what’s happening in each other’s lives.
One of my dearest friends has been a single mother for several years now. Her ex-husband has remarried, moved away and rarely sees or interacts with their son. She has done a wonderful job raising her boy and he is a handsome, intelligent, respectful high school senior with an adorable girlfriend (the daughter of another mutual friend) and bright future.
As we sat on her couch enjoying a glass of wine and good conversation, her son came into the room for a few moments to say good-night to all of us. After he retired, I turned to my friend and again complimented her, remarking on what a fine young man she has raised. As always, she was glowing with pride and love.
But then she got very serious, turned to me and said, “You know what? He’s an atheist. He told me the other day. We were talking about someone who had died and he said, ‘Mom, I believe that when you die, that’s it.’ I had no idea he felt that way.”
Many parents would be not just disappointed by such an announcement, but utterly distraught.
“What do you think about that?” I asked my friend earnestly.
“I didn’t react when he told me,” she explained. “I just said, ‘Oh, really?’ and asked him to explain why he felt that way. We had a good talk. I didn’t try to convince him that he should believe differently. I just accepted what he told me and reminded him that I am a believer and so long as he lives in my house with me, he is expected to attend church. He never thought otherwise.”
She elaborated: “I don’t believe for a moment that he’s really become an atheist. I raised him to believe and I think this is just a rebellious phase that he is going through. I think he told me he doesn’t believe in God as much for shock value as anything else. And to test me. But I’m not worried about it because he will work things out for himself and be just fine.”
And then she added, “Besides, I pray for him like crazy and I have faith that my prayers will be heard.” She smiled as she said that.
Over the past few days, I’ve thought a lot about that conversation with my friend, especially within the context of celebrating the New Year.
My friend was not downtrodden, depressed, angry, spiteful or desperate. She is not exerting stern control over her son, demanding that he participate in living a life of faith beyond requiring his customary attendance in church with her. She is not forcing her beliefs or will upon him.
As I considered the situation and my friend’s response, I realized that there are two lessons to be learned from her example.
First, she is exhibiting Christ-like behavior. We are invited but never compelled or required to believe in and follow the Savior. Just like her son, we have the gift of free will. We can graciously accept the gift of life offered to us or reject it. The choice is entirely up to us, but no matter what we decide, we are unconditionally loved. Her love for her son will not change no matter what he believes. She will always welcome him into fellowship with her, but she would, obviously, be much happier if he were to again embrace Christianity.
Our Savior will always love us, but is so much happier when we accept the gift of eternal life by being faithful, grateful servants and ambassadors.
Secondly, she is optimistic and hopeful. She is facing the days ahead and all of the challenges they will bring with a cheerful, faithful and hopeful heart. Because Christianity is about nothing if not hope, she is living out her faith one moment at a time.
That revelation brought me to one of my all-time favorite Psalms:
No king is saved by the size of his army;
no warrior escapes by his great strength.A horse is a vain hope for deliverance;
despite all its great strength it cannot save.But the eyes of the Lord are on those who fear him,
on those whose hope is in his unfailing love,to deliver them from death
and keep them alive in famine.We wait in hope for the Lord;
he is our help and our shield.In him our hearts rejoice,
for we trust in his holy name.May your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord,
even as we put our hope in you.Psalm 33:16-22
The dawning of a New Year is a great time to reflect, reassess, and retool. But in this New Year, as in all previous years, we must remember and be thankful for the source of our strength, salvation and hope. The truth never changes, even as the seasons of our lives pass by, people come into and leave our presence, and we, along with our loved ones, exercise our free will — sometimes making excellent choices and other times not. Through it all, our hope lies in the one who bestows his merciful kindness and promise of eternal life upon us.
As I thought about that delightful young man and, like his mother, prayed that he will receive guidance, wisdom and direction, I found myself reciting the words of my very favorite Bible verse. Its truth is so simple, yet so profound. It tells the story of that young man’s life, his mother’s life, my life, your life. My New Year’s wish for my friend and her son, for all of you and for myself is that this verse may inspire and guide all of our lives in 2008.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11
{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }
Your such a sweet blessing my friend.
Denise’s last blog post..Thankful Thursday
What a wonderful post. I am in awed by your friend’s demeanor towards her son’s declaration. Such hope and faith. And I totally agree in what you said here. Happy New Year!
zamejias’s last blog post..Thankful Thursday
You make me think this morning, Hopeful Spirit. Indeed, Jesus never requires us to follow Him. When those we love most don’t, we can have hope in His mercy. It makes me think of one of MY favorite verses–”Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:22-23)
Happy New Year, my friend.
Tami’s last blog post..Because You Say So
You couldn’t possibly have known how much I needed this post right now. My teenage step-daughter recently made the same declaration. We handled it much differently and now she is not speaking to us- feeling unloved and unaccepted. We obviously should have done things much differently than we did. We now have a lot of damage to undo.
Melanie’s last blog post..Thankful Thursday #1
What a wonderful attitude - a vision filled with hope and true faith. As parents, it’s much easier to try to take things into our own hands and control the future, but a faith-filled life is more peaceful, as demonstrated by your friend. She is willing to step back and not interfere on God’s work in her son’s life.
Heather@mommymonk’s last blog post..Overwhelming Love and Forgiveness
What a beautiful post. Jeremiah 29:11 is one of my favorites. Thanks for sharing your story. God Bless!
Cheryl’s last blog post..THANKFUL THURSDAY
The Word of God never returns void so your friend is right to be hopeful and encouraged!! Thank you for sharing her response to a difficult situation. And, I’ll be praying for the salvation of that young man!!
Lady Why’s last blog post..Stay At Home Daughters presents…
What a wonderful testament of your friend’s faith! Thanks for reminding us of hope, and how to lead others to faith…through showing ours in love
Ann’s last blog post..Thankful Thursday–New beginnings
It is wonderful that your friend responded so calmly and lovingly to her son. Often, such phases are simply a by-product of someone that thinks about things. With maturity comes a realization of something and someone greater than ourselves. I too said a prayer with your for your friend and her nice son.
Happy New Years to you!
Viola Jaynes’s last blog post..A Time To Reflect
Beautiful post!
My son often came out with words to shock and test my love for him when he was a teen. Today, he is the father of 3 and a deacon in his church. Just giving him back to God through those years of testing and concern was the only way I could endure.
Blessings,
Mama Bear’s last blog post..Thankful Thursday!
WOW!
that blew me away! You know what lessons here…thankful to you for sharing them…perhaps we all need to be like your friend…patient, faithful and discerning in our words….
we can’t make anybody do anything they are NOT ready to do….
wonderful!
the lesson was wonderful….
peace today!
lori
My eldest son is the same way as your friends son. He is 21 now and lives in NYC - a long way from home but it is interesting when I say I am praying for a certain situation or concern he always says “thanks Mom.” Like her I know my son has a firm foundation and will come back to Christ, stronger than ever because it will be his choice, his faith and not mine. Also, that is my favorite scripture for my entire family.
Prayers going up! God Bless!
Kathleen Marie’s last blog post..A Day in the Life of…
Your friends reaction to her son’s belief is like you said “Christ-like” and I know that God will hear her prayers for her son.
Thank you for sharing.
Blessings to you and yours in 2008 and beyond.
Iris’s last blog post..Thankful Thursday - New Beginnings
What a beautiful and inspiring post, Hopeful Spirit. I think that’s probably one of the hardest things that we parents have to face… the fact that when our children get older, they can make their own decisions about their spirituality and what they believe.
Our Heavenly Father gave us all a free will… He didn’t give it to just parents and then give parents the right to take their children’s free will away, by forcing choices on them. That’s what believer’s baptism is… the baptism of adults who have made their own choice to be saved. That’s also why the Amish do not *make* their children choose the Amish lifestyle and allow them to have their freedom in their young adult age… so that when they DO come back to the fold and decide to embrace the Amish lifestyle and beliefs, it will be because they made the free will choice to do so.
It’s hard for us parents to wait, with baited breath, as our adult children make those free will choices though. I admire your friend for her trust in God. I wonder if she read the book “Praying Your Prodigal Home” by Richard A. Burr? That book is a life-saver to all parents who have children who have strayed away from the faith.
Love and God bless you~ Pearl
Pearl’s last blog post..Resolutions
simply WOW! what a great post, very inspirational indeed. hope u have a blessed year ahead.
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This is something that causes me to worry until I think about who’s in control. I have certain expectations of my kids, and I try to be a good example for them to follow, but I’m inadequate. I believe any earthly father is.
All I know is that I push my kids to make decisions on their own, and sometimes that takes a swift kick in the ankle, but I know they will someday be on their own, and if they do what I say all the time only because I say, they won’t know why I said it when they get old enough to make those decisions on their own.
great post!
What a beutiful post. Hopeful Spirit, there is much wisdom and grace in the lives here and in this story.
I, too, wait upon the Lord and I have hope.
Thank you so much for this story!!
Lynn’s last blog post..Spiritually Mismatched - Weekend Devotion
What a wonderful post. Happy New Year
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